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ORJ 6 Model Essay

Jason's PLA students can submit their 6th ORJ posts here.

Which style of writing do you prefer?

narrative
1
33%
descriptive
0
No votes
persuasive
0
No votes
compare
0
No votes
contrast
0
No votes
cause and effect
2
67%
example
0
No votes
process
0
No votes
classification
0
No votes
 
Total votes : 3

ORJ 6 Model Essay

Postby Jason on Fri Oct 16, 2009 7:21 pm

Hello PLA students. I hope you are all doing well. We started drafting essays based on topics we chose from the list we received. Some of us will be writing persuasive essays while others write a different type. This time, you have a choice. As you study and practice writing, it is a great idea to read sample texts like the one below and respond to them. Please read the sample essay, reflect on its content and organization, and respond in a paragraph. What kind of essay do you think it is? What is the thesis statement? How is it supported? Is the conclusion strong? What do you learn from it? Do you agree or disagree with the contents? Why (not)? Remember to try and reply to your classmates as well. Good luck and enjoy. :)
"A dog is man's best friend." That common saying may contain some truth, but dogs are not the only animal friend whose companionship people enjoy. For many people, a cat is their best friend. Despite what dog lovers may believe, cats make excellent housepets as they are good companions, they are civilized members of the household, and they are easy to care for.

In the first place, people enjoy the companionship of cats. Many cats are affectionate. They will snuggle up and ask to be petted, or scratched under the chin. Who can resist a purring cat? If they're not feeling affectionate, cats are generally quite playful. They love to chase balls and feathers, or just about anything dangling from a string. They especially enjoy playing when their owners are participating in the game. Contrary to popular opinion, cats can be trained. Using rewards and punishments, just like with a dog, a cat can be trained to avoid unwanted behavior or perform tricks. Cats will even fetch!

In the second place, cats are civilized members of the household. Unlike dogs, cats do not bark or make other loud noises. Most cats don't even meow very often. They generally lead a quiet existence. Cats also don't often have "accidents." Mother cats train their kittens to use the litter box, and most cats will use it without fail from that time on. Even stray cats usually understand the concept when shown the box and will use it regularly. Cats do have claws, and owners must make provision for this. A tall scratching post in a favorite cat area of the house will often keep the cat content to leave the furniture alone. As a last resort, of course, cats can be declawed.

Lastly, one of the most attractive features of cats as housepets is their ease of care. Cats do not have to be walked. They get plenty of exercise in the house as they play, and they do their business in the litter box. Cleaning a litter box is a quick, painless procedure. Cats also take care of their own grooming. Bathing a cat is almost never necessary because under ordinary circumstances cats clean themselves. Cats are more particular about personal cleanliness than people are. In addition, cats can be left home alone for a few hours without fear. Unlike some pets, most cats will not destroy the furnishings when left alone. They are content to go about their usual activities until their owners return.

Cats are low maintenance, civilized companions. People who have small living quarters or less time for pet care should appreciate these characteristics of cats. However, many people who have plenty of space and time still opt to have a cat because they love the cat personality. In many ways, cats are the ideal housepet.
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Re: ORJ 6 Model Essay

Postby PLA youn young on Tue Oct 20, 2009 4:05 pm

When I read the essay, I was very shameful, because it looked like mine. Perhaps, the writer seemed to try to state the strengths of cats as pets, compared to dogs. I think the above essay is not that organized, expressed well as for the topic. Also, there are some awkward words in the writing. Through the essay, I should be sorry for my writings that I have ever written.
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Re: ORJ 6 Model Essay

Postby Jason on Tue Oct 20, 2009 4:13 pm

PLA youn young wrote:When I read the essay, I was very shameful, because it looked like mine. Perhaps, the writer seemed to try to state the strengths of cats as pets, compared to dogs. I think the above essay is not that organized, expressed well as for the topic. Also, there are some awkward words in the writing. Through the essay, I should be sorry for my writings that I have ever written.

You're a good writer and you are getting better every day. If you ever feel sorry about a piece of writing, you can always go back and redrafted. The important thing to remember is no piece of writing is ever perfect. There is always something that can be revised and improved.
Do you think the writer was comparing cats and dogs or contrasting the two as pets? What are some examples of awkward language the writer uses?
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Re: ORJ 6 Model Essay

Postby pla_whiteinblue on Tue Nov 03, 2009 8:04 am

i think this essay is an opinion and explaining essay, and the thesis statement is that a cat is their best friend for many people.,
there are supported by what many cats are affectionate, what cats are civilzed members of the household, and what cats are ease of care.
i think the conclusion is weaken that cats are low maintenance, civilized companions.
and i think there are some comparing between dogs and cats or other housepets and cats to focus on how much cilized cats arel.
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